I don't know about you....

... but personally, I need the internet to tell me how to do things. Sometimes i find myself in the middle of a crazy photoshop file and I'm all "how the hell can I make that guy's arm into a movie ticket for Phat Girlz.... or more appropiately...why?" Other times it's more simple, like how to kill a man with my wireless router.

But there are times when you need real help. There are times when you need to know that God forgives you... but how can you know that? how can you ask for his forgiveness?

Here's how: http://www.wikihow.com/Find-Forgiveness-through-God, a simple, step-by-step instructional wiki post on how to ask forgiveness from the Almighty - be it for something as benign as covetting thine neighbor's wife or as heinous as being Clay Aiken.

Thank you, teh intraweb.

(also, in case he's not returning your calls or maybe you just lost his number, here's how to find God - I particularly like "look in your local library")

(and after you find him, why not take someone else's advice on how to have your very own personal relationship with the Big Guy himself! just make sure to give him a reach-around, i hear he's partial to them...)

[barring all contact with god, try stopping by the 42nd street stop on the A train and talking to the scientologists! just look at the awesome things they can talk you into...)